Baby Loss Awareness Month: The many faces of grief
Baby Loss Awareness Month: Recognising That Loss Has Many Faces
October is Baby Loss Awareness Month — a time to pause, remember, and hold space for every family who has experienced the heartbreak of losing a baby.
Baby loss isn’t one story — it has many faces. Every experience is unique, but every one of them deserves to be acknowledged, validated, and met with compassion.
Loss Has Many Faces
When we talk about baby loss, people often think of miscarriage or stillbirth — but loss can happen in many different ways.
It might mean:
An early miscarriage, perhaps before a heartbeat was even seen.
A baby born too soon or too sick to survive.
A pregnancy ended because of a severe abnormality or medical complication.
The quiet loss of a baby after birth, when parents only had hours or days together.
A hydatidiform mole or other pregnancy where no baby could develop, yet the grief is still real.
The loss of a long-awaited pregnancy following fertility treatment.
Each of these experiences changes a family’s story. They bring different emotions — shock, sadness, anger, guilt, love, and longing. All of them are valid.
How Many Are Affected?
Loss in pregnancy and infancy is far more common than most people realise. Around 1 in 4 pregnancies ends in miscarriage, and in the UK, roughly 250,000 pregnancies each year do not continue. Stillbirth affects around 1 in 250 births.
These numbers don’t capture every experience — such as molar pregnancies, ectopic pregnancies, or terminations for medical reasons — but they remind us that baby loss touches many lives.
If you’ve experienced loss, you’re not alone.
Why Awareness Matters
For a long time, baby loss wasn’t spoken about. Many people were told to “move on” or “try again.” But grief doesn’t work like that.
Baby Loss Awareness Month gives space for families to share, remember, and find comfort in knowing that others understand.
On October 15th, the Wave of Light invites families around the world to light a candle at 7pm to honour every baby gone too soon. For one hour, the world glows with remembrance and love.
Supporting After Loss
Healing after loss isn’t a straight line — it’s a journey that changes over time. Some days the grief feels gentler; on others, it floods back unexpectedly.
As the founder of Mobile Midwives, I am also one of the 1 in 4 women who has experienced pregnancy loss. I know that grief doesn’t disappear with time — it shifts, softens, and sometimes resurfaces when I least expect it.
For many people, a new pregnancy or the birth of another baby can bring a swirl of emotions — joy, guilt, fear, and sadness all at once. It’s okay to need support at any stage, whether your loss was recent, years ago, or if it feels new again after giving birth.
Some people find comfort in talking — with a partner, friend, counsellor, or midwife who truly listens. Others prefer quiet rituals: writing a letter, lighting a candle, or creating a small memorial space.
There are also cultural and traditional ways to process loss and nurture healing:
Closing the bones massage — a postnatal ritual from Latin American and African traditions, helping to “close” the body and spirit after birth or loss.
Japanese Jizō dolls — small statues representing protection and peace for babies who have died. Families often dress them in hats or bibs, honouring their memory with love.
These practices remind us that grief and love are universal. It’s okay to borrow from different traditions if they bring you comfort or help you move through the rawest points of grief.
If you need support, you are not alone.
There are many compassionate organisations offering help, including:
Sands – Support for families after stillbirth or neonatal death.
Tommy’s – Information and research about miscarriage, stillbirth, and premature birth.
Petals – Counselling for anyone affected by baby loss.
Antenatal Results and Choices (ARC) – Specialist support for people who have had to end a pregnancy for medical reasons or following difficult scan results.
The Miscarriage Association – Understanding and advice for anyone affected by miscarriage, ectopic, or molar pregnancy.
And through Mobile Midwives, we offer gentle, non-clinical calls where you can talk about your loss, your feelings, or your next steps. You don’t have to face it alone. Sometimes, just being heard is a powerful act of healing.
A Message to Every Parent Who’s Experienced Loss
Your grief is real.
Your baby mattered.
Your love continues.
Whether your loss was early or late, visible or unseen — it will always be part of your story, and you deserve compassion and care as you navigate it.
This October, as we mark Baby Loss Awareness Month, we light candles for every baby loved and missed — and for every parent carrying that love forward.
💗 If you’d like a safe space to talk, Mobile Midwives are here for you — with gentle, understanding support, whenever you’re ready.
In Loving memory of my 4 Precious Angels.
